由Anne Gagliano
这些天生活非常紧张，特别是对于消防员来说。188金博网网址多少消防是危险的，身体和情感上的征税。我的消防员丈夫迈克在过去的班轮过去几下面有一个纵火的火灾和婴儿死亡率。战斗火灾通常会令人振奋，但它的收费物理上。参加SIDS的场景就像它的令人心碎一样，因为它得到了大多数人不能理解的情感损失。
For the average firefighter, the work doesn’t end when they leave the firehouse. Many go on to second jobs to earn an extra income that is often needed these days to support a family. Firefighters are, typically, the finest of people and they desire above all else to take good care of their loved ones. For these fine souls it seems the work never ends—it just goes on and on.
作为消防员的推动，这项工作变得更加强硬，因为他们采取了偶数重量的领导力。官员不再担任自己，而是船员和整个车站。对于如此多的压力，过度劳累的消防员可能会在烟雾上运行，为增加危机的储备很少。他们做得很好，只是把头放在水面上方。如果没有一些帮助，就没有休息，没有休息，没有休息，没有和平和复苏，过度劳累，过度的消防员可能决定放弃一切并远离他们只是为了下车而离开跑步机。在荒岛上被造成沉船，除了寻找食物的狩猎是必要的，开始听起来非常好，即使是地狱般的监狱的无意识的苦涩可能会在紧张的故障的边缘上吸引一个。
In a perfect world, the firefighter’s sanctuary is “Home Sweet Home”; no need to go elsewhere. They enter into a quiet, orderly living space where the children are well-behaved and thriving; the house is spotless and in no need of repair; and a delicious variety of meals are served in a timely fashion. The spouse eagerly awaits their arrival, cheerfully greats them at the door, and places absolutely no demands on them either physically or emotionally. Ah, heaven! Let the healing begin!
Unfortunately, it’s not a perfect world. In the real world, children are never quiet for very long, houses don’t stay clean and in repair by themselves, and no spouse can be perfectly cheerful and selfless all the time, especially if they work too. In fact, home is often more stressful than work as the demands of children and housework can be overwhelming. An exhausted firefighter may try to escape into the television or computer, or stay later than necessary at the firehouse just to avoid going home. They may spend an inordinate amount of time involved in hobbies or sports. They may even become so desperate as to seek comfort from drugs or alcohol just to find relief from the physical soreness and emotional drain that is unique to firefighting. These types of crutches drive spouses apart as resentment grows, and this is, perhaps, one of the reasons firefighters have such a high divorce rate. Something’s got to give;有人got to give. Firefighters need a sanctuary, and the sanctuary of choice is home.
那么我们如何回家一个人每个人都想成为？一个宁静的家庭始于劳动分工。如果他们认为这是一个，一切都更愿意分享他们的份额公平的分享。决定谁应该在同意中与谁做什么。如果没有人有时间做家务，那么雇用某人为你清洁或削减工作时间所以有人拥有the time. If you both feel you’re doing more than the other, sit down and make out a list so you can actuallysee如果它不平衡，另一个是做什么 - 然后均匀地划分列表。劳动力不平等是离婚的主要原因，因此必须解决。婚姻是伙伴关系;当工作负荷相等时，成功的婚姻会导致结果。
接下来，消防员配偶必须了解物理疲惫是本专业的日常方面，因此可以在尽可能休息的消防员时间休息。我的消防队员的车站在西雅图市拥有最繁忙的引擎;他通常都在整夜。我已经让我们的卧室成为一个黑暗的坟墓，带有沉重的遮挡窗帘，他可以睡觉。少许按摩也会缓解紧张的肌肉，帮助您的消防员睡眠而不借药或酒精。我曾经遇到过关于我在我的演讲结束时出现的一个女人，在我的演讲结束时，我刚刚将按摩的好处视为睡眠援助。她自豪地告诉我，她把消防员送到按摩治疗师every week- 现在，现在这就是我在谈论的！多么好妻子！睡眠剥夺是消防员之间的抱怨;他们迫切需要在这个领域的帮助。
消防的情绪损失也需要一个出口。188金博网网址多少愈合和帮助的最佳来源是您，配偶 - 您的温柔和护理优于任何治疗师的沙发。需要时间倾听，在需要时倾听和抚慰，你的消防员会在风暴中看到你的避风港。并找到有趣的事情，作为一对夫妇提升悲伤的精神 - 你们都喜欢的东西。成为伙伴，伴侣，玩伴，所以你的消防员不会wantto spend too much time at the station or pursuing hobbies. Everybody needs some fun in their lives to be happy; make a concerted effort to find it. Even when it’s not in your bailiwick, try to be a good sport for each other. For example, my firefighter likes to scream his guts out at rock concerts; he finds this to be a tremendous stress release. I do not. But I go on occasion with cotton tucked firmly in my ears to give him this outlet, for I’d rather he take me along than anyone else. And he dislikes a certain chain restaurant, but this he endures for my sake, as he knows it is my favorite; and he usually lets me pick the movie too!
No home is perfect, no spouse is perfect; but every home can be a sanctuary with a little bit of effort, a little bit of compromise, and a whole lot of communication!
Anne Gagliano已与西雅图（WA）消防部门的迈克加格利亚队队长27年结婚。她和她的丈夫在建设和保持强烈的婚姻方面讲座。
