Miscellany.

Miscellany.

Showing How it is Done,

Chief Paige recently attempted to show some quick work in his Department, and this is the way the local paper says he did it: " Saturday afternoon the fire-alarm box at the Penitentiary was tested. As the whole Department could not be trusted from home at one time, only the East-side Hose Cart joined in the race. Mayor Elwood, Chief Paige, and a number of friends drove up to the Penitentiary. The warden, the clerk and the ladies were on hand. Altogether they made a respectable-sized audience, and the weather being so bright they were in fine spirits and eager for the race. Mr. Paige stepped lightly up to the box and said aloud, so all could hear, " Now the horse is in the stall.” He then opened the door and pulled down the lever. “ Now," he said, “ he is on the floor.” Twitch, twitch, twitch, went the long hand of his timer. " And now,” again, " he is hitched." The long hand seemed to pull a few more teeth, and Mr. Paige spoke louder, Now he is out of the door I” The company soon caught their breath and sat down to wait until the horse came in sight. As Mr. Paige crossed his legs, the Mayor remarked, “ Old Bill has just about turned the corner?" “ No," said the Chief, "he’s across the railroad by this time.” The ladies inquired if it would not hurt the horse to run him so far. " Oh no,” they were assured, ” it is only a milejust far enough for a horse with wind fand legs like BiH’s.” " Rut now. he ought to be in sight,” said the Chief, Then all were silent for a minute, and the Chief grew uneasy. Various modes of encouragement and cheer were proffered, and some even went so far as to talk among themselves, as though not intended for other ears, of Mr. Paige s wonderful new bed, six feet wjde. But the moments were painful; we will recall no more, only to say not many passed before the Chief rushed to the telegraph office and told that Chicago man to come down and fix his machine."